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Rustlers' Rhapsody
(1985)
Director: Hugh Wilson
Cast: Tom Berenger, G.W. Bailey, Marilu Henner
Roger Ebert has stated, on more than one occasion, that there are a great
number of relatively unwatched movies that people would love if they just
watched them, but that this same potential audience thinks it doesn't want to
watch the movies' subject matter and the way it gets executed. While I do think
that Ebert's feelings here are somewhat naive - does he really
think the average Joe Sixpack would ever be enchanted by movies such as Last
Year At Marienbad or Double Suicide? - I do agree that
there are certainly a number of unknown movies that do have what it takes to
capture an audience, but something is in the way that makes the potential
audience reluctant to try it.
I admit I've experienced several times that feeling of thinking I didn't want to
see a particular movie, one of those times being years ago when Rustlers'
Rhapsody opened in theaters. It looked dumb to me - the uncomic Tom
Berenger in a comedy? A comedy with a dumb-sounding title?
A comedy that felt it
had to advertise itself with a lame-looking poster that seemed more
appropriate for a drama? A comedy that was a WESTERN? (Yes, I must admit back
then I hadn't yet learned how good the western genre was.) So I
immediately dismissed the movie, and thought no more about it until several
years later it popped up on TV one boring weekend afternoon. With nothing
else to do I decided to take a look - at the very least it might be interesting
in its awfulness, as I had already learned about movies. You can imagine my
surprise when, just a few minutes in, I found myself laughing at the movie. It
was even more surprising finding myself laughing throughout the remainder of the
movie as well. Though I got a lot of laughs, I couldn't help but feel a little
ashamed that my previous attitude had stopped me from getting such enjoyment for
so long. Taking another look at the movie today, even with now seeing some
problems with an eye now more observant and critical, I still wince a little
thinking of that dumb dismissal I made so long ago.
Rustlers' Rhapsody isn't like western comedies such as
Evil Roy Slade - it's
a spoof of the western genre itself, though its specific target is those hokey
singing-cowboy oaters of the '30s and '40s. The narrator (Bailey, of
Police Academy fame) on the
soundtrack introduces us to Rex O'Herlihan (Berenger), a golden age western hero
akin to Gene Autry or Roy Rogers, who in the opening clip is doing the standard
B western shtick of hearing a stagecoach under attack by masked bandits, and
riding to the rescue. After talking nostalgically about O'Herlihan, the narrator
wonders out loud, "Always made me kind of wonder what one of those B westerns
would look like if they still made them today," and ZAP, O'Herlihan and the
bandits are not only transported to a world of color and Dolby stereo, but a
world where a group of bandits realize they can take on one pursuing man instead
of fleeing from him, and as O'Herlihan finds out as he quickly turns tail and
tries to jump and hide in a tree from his running horse, the good guy doesn't
always make good decisions.
This setup - placing one of those pearl-toothed singing cowboys in a western
environment that accurately recreates how uncouth and violent the real west
was - is full of promise, one that most people could easily think of several
good gags for in less than a minute. Strangely, after the subsequent opening
credits, the movie completely throws away this setup in pursuit of something
else - an omen of the comic execution to come. But before getting into that, a
look at the plot coming from the new setup. In the town of Oakwood Estates,
singing cowboy Rex O'Herlihan rides in on his trusty steed Wildfire, and
immediately knows something is up. Peter (Bailey), the town's drunk, tries to fill
him in on the situation, pointing out the key players ("Now over there is the
sheriff, obviously a corrupt old coward who gets his orders from the Colonel.")
But it turns out Rex already had a good idea of the situation - he tells the
incredulous Peter that it's like this in every town he goes to! To prove it, Rex
asks him, "Do you have [in this town] a very pretty but somehow asexual new
schoolmarm? Is the editor of the paper a young idealist who hocked everything to
buy his press?"
Yes, years before the notorious bomb The Last Action Hero was
made, there
was a movie with a protagonist in a world where he is familiar with
all of its conventions and clichés. The difference here, however, is that seeing
this particular all-knowing hero knowing everyone's way of thinking and the
outcome of every situation proves to be amusing instead of tiresome and lame. It
does help that the particular genre being targeted here is more of a fresh
target than other spoofed-to-death genres, like tough cops or slashers (see
Viewer Discretion Advised for a typically
lame example of the latter.) It certainly helps that the all-knowing protagonist
in this particular instance is a likable one instead of being a loud and smarmy
smartass who quickly gets on your nerves. Though you might share my same initial
reaction to Tom Berenger being cast in the lead role of a comedy, upon seeing
the movie it quickly becomes apparent that he's a good choice for this
particular kind of comedy. A singing cowboy isn't funny to watch when he
purposely acts funny - he is funny to watch because of the seriousness he
constantly projects, especially when the particular situation he's in is
hopelessly cornball to us in the audience. Having a brash funnyman like Jim
Carrey in the role would be a disaster, and would make us want to strangle the
hero. Berenger plays it more or less straight, and though his character is
all-knowing, he is never sarcastic or or a braggart about it to anyone.
The casualness Berenger brings to expressing his character's knowledge and
using it to his advantage not only endears us to him, it's also pretty amusing
to watch someone so all-knowing having a kind of blasé attitude to it all.
Berenger proves to also be game to give a straight face to the sillier aspects
his character has to do - singing, for one thing - and his good attitude here
makes us like and laugh at his O'Herlihan character even more. But what
really makes the movie laugh-out-loud funny many times is the way it makes fun
of all the silliness and clichés found in singing cowboy westerns. Admittedly,
it does go for the obvious at times - for example, most viewers will correctly
guess ahead of time that O'Herlihan's flashy silk duds will inevitably provoke
some varmint to crudely ask him what his sexual preference is. But aside from a
few instances like that, the movie prefers to not only sink its knife into the
hokum, but twists the blade a little so that under a new angle we see just how
dumb it was to being with. When O'Herlihan is ready to leave town and whistles
for Wildfire, the horse come running with a piece of railing still tied to it.
When a varmint tells the pals standing behind him to shoot at this
holier-than-thou stranger, that same varmint is the one who gets hit because -
well, he's standing in front of them. And in the inevitable subsequent scene
when the varmint's friends display their friend's dead body at the ranch of the
evil Colonel (Andy Griffith!), the Colonel screams at them, not understanding why anyone
would put a dead bleeding corpse on a valuable antique couch.
It's not just singing cowboy westerns that get spoofed here. After the Colonel
gets frustrated by repeated failed attempts by his men to assassinate this
do-gooder, he gets desperate enough to hire some spaghetti
western cowboys (lead
by European actor Fernando Rey, a star of several such movies.) Though Peter
observes these bounty killers are macho enough to wear those long raincoats in
110-degree heat, even they find themselves dumbfounded against this impossibly
clean do-gooder. Finally the Colonel concocts a very clever can't-miss plan,
which consists of sending for... well, I won't spoil it for you. However, I will
reveal that O'Herlihan's initial face-to-face confrontation with this foe is one
of the funniest sequences I've seen for quite a while. It is so absurd in its
idea, yet handled so straight-faced and almost casually that I couldn't stop
laughing. The whole sequence could have been even funnier, had the movie not
made the curious choice of previously giving us a sneak peek at just who
this adversary of O'Herlihan's was several minutes before they actually meet for
the first time. When we find out who this person is and then have to wait for he
and O'Herlihan to meet, we have already thought of the kind of gags that are
coming, and as a result the actual confrontation lacks the full knock-out blow
it would have had otherwise. There are some other ways in which
writer/director Hugh Wilson (Police
Academy, Guarding Tess) makes
miscalculations with the humor so that the movie
is not as funny as it could have been. Don't get
me wrong - there is still a lot to immensely
enjoy here. I guess these few miscalculations
just seem doubly disappointing compared to the
material that really hits the bulls-eye, so much
so that that I am puzzled as to why Wilson
didn't see these particular things were
seriously out of step with everything else. Some
of these things do involve a few truly dumb and
unfunny gags, such as an incredibly lame and
unimaginative bit where O'Herlihan and Wildfire
do some boring shenanigans to wiggle their way
out of an ambush by the spaghetti western
cowboys. Fortunately, there are few such moments
totally devoid of humor like that one. Many of
the problem come from the movie's leisurely and
easy-going pace. Now, there is nothing
automatically wrong with a movie that isn't in
such a hurry to get going - in these Michael Bay
days, it is actually kind of refreshing. The
problem is that the movie is too
leisurely and easy-going. Rustlers'
Rhapsody is so laid-back that not long
after O'Herlihan first enters Oakwood Estates,
it quickly starts to forget that, though corny
and predictable as those old westerns, they at
least had a story, and one that moved
along at a reasonable clip. The movie seems
content just to make us laugh, and while that
might not sound so bad, it really becomes a
problem near the end. There, the movie
desperately tries to wrap everything up in five
minutes, and as a result becomes senselessly
violent, as well as relying on deux ex
machina so heavily that even Gene Autry
would have rolled his eyes. Even with such a
rushed and abrupt ending, the movie still isn't
able to wrap every
issue
that comes up during the running time. Some of
these issues involve the secondary characters
O'Herlihan comes across. During the course of
the movie, there is the expected love triangle
O'Herlihan finds himself in, with the Colonel's
daughter (Sela Ward of Sisters) and the
girl at the local saloon who makes a living by
charging men to engage in conversation with her,
played by Marlihu Henner (Taxi).
Actually, the love triangle only comes up in one
sequence (endless, but with a good punchline),
and afterwards the whole idea of two women
competing for O'Herlihan's affections is simply
dropped and never brought up again. As well, the
women themselves are mostly forgotten about from
this point on. Another thing that gets dropped
and never brought up again has to do with the
character of the evil Colonel. In each of the
Colonel's first few scenes, there is at least
one hint that he might be gay (and yes, seeing
the macho Andy Griffith doing things like
speaking in an effeminate voice does provide
amusement.) Then after several scenes of this,
this curious side to the Colonel is suddenly
forgotten about and never brought up again, even
though he has a number of scenes left to appear
in. It's odd that Wilson didn't dig deeper
into these and other characters and their
situations in the movie to find more nuggets of
comic gold. In the end, only Berenger and Bailey
have their characters developed properly, so it
is perhaps fortunate that Wilson not only has
them in almost every scene in the movie, but
that both actors are very funny in their roles.
In fairness to Wilson, I should again point out
that although he wrote a screenplay with a weak
story and underdeveloped subplots and
characters, at the same time he managed to write
a screenplay that I feel has more than the
minimum number of gags and zany situations to be
considered funny. He also brings an extra touch
to the movie with his direction; he faithfully
replicates every angle, every outdoor location,
every use of indoor sets exactly as these
B westerns did it in the '30s and '40s. The time
he also spends replicating the spaghetti western
genre is also amazingly accurate. He obviously
couldn't have succeeded in this replication if
he didn't have an affection for westerns. In
fact, there is such a strong feeling of
likeability surrounding Rustlers' Rhapsody
that by itself it makes it hard to resist
despite its problems. The fact that the movie
also happens to have quite a number of hilarious
moments just increases this feeling. Though I
must admit that even after all these years I
still think the poster (replicated on the video
box) is lame, as well as that title still being
dumb - for one
thing, there are no rustlers in the movie.
Check for availability on Amazon (VHS)
Check for availability on Amazon (DVD)
See also: Evil
Roy Slade, The
Fiendish Plot Of Dr. Fu Manchu,
Hysterical
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