Letters are arranged from newest to oldest.
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April 19, 2008
[re:
Evil Roy Slade]
You mention that it's a busted pilot.
That brought back a distant memory of a summer long ago,
some time before 1971 when ERS was filmed. Back
then they used to show busted pilots in the summer, for
a bit of variety from the endless reruns. I recall
seeing a busted pilot for a half-hour comedy called
Sheriff Who? The premise what that there was this
little western town being terrorized by a bad guy, and
every week they would hire a new sheriff in the hopes of
finding one who could do something, but the man wouldn't
last more than one episode. The name of the bad guy?
Evil Roy Slade! I do believe that week's Sheriff was
played by (wait for it) Dick Shawn. As I recall, at the
end, he decided to give up law enforcement to become an
interior decorator: "I want to colour co-ordinate the
west!" I guess the producers just couldn't let the idea
drop, the same way busted pilot Nick Knight
turned up years later as Forever Knight, which
actually lasted for several years and spawned a couple
of spin-off novels. It's good to recycle!
Sandra
February 3, 2008
Hello,
I just wanted to thank you for your review on the move
Didn't You Hear, I saw this movie when I was
about 12 or 13 years old, I'm hoping that this is the
same movie I saw, But I really think it is because I've
always remembered the name of the Star, that is Dennis
Christopher.
I Tried to find this movie a few years ago to no avail,
but I went searching again today for this movie and came
across your article on it. As a result I found a new
copy on Amazon.com, I just wanted to thank you, because
although I cant really remember a lot about the movie
there was something about it back then that moved me and
I as well cant forget the movie. I ordered it on Amazon
and cant wait to see it again.
For a while there I was wondering if I was the only one
who saw it besides my best friend who went with me back
then. Thank you So Much.
Carol Fisher
January 28, 2008
[re:
Abraxas]
I basically paid $.50 for this movie,
and I think I'd rather have gotten the gumballs. (It's
on a double DVD, with Slipstream, yet another baaaaad
movie, from the $1 bin at Target) Holy cow I wonder how
movies like this get made. The creepy town it was filmed
in, gives me the heebie jeebies! What else is there to
say, you said it all pretty much. As a lover of bad (cheezey)
movies, this one isn't even "so bad it's good". It's
right up there with Super Troopers. AYYYE.
H
January 2, 2008
I stumbled on your site looking for an
unknown movie that I don't seem to know the answer to. I
was born in 1980 throughout the 80's I grew up watching
many great movies that are unknown to today's audience.
As each year goes by, I seem to remember the names
slowly but surely. I am trying to complete a collection
of very rare 1980's movies that barely anyone even knows
about. There are just a few left that my brain just
refuses to find in the file system inside my brain. As
you can imagine, some of the movies I can't remember
were viewed by me when I was young. What was my mother
thinking to let me watch horror movies that young?!
Anyway, I have three suggestions of movies for you to
review that I DO know the titles to:
Hamburger...The Original Motion Picture
Pulse
&
Morgan Stewart's Coming Home
I might have more later.
Great site by the way.
Chris Redfield
November 23, 2007
I found your site while looking for
information about my roommate from my freshman year of
college, Howie Lichter. Yes, that’s really what he went
by. I know it sounds like a prank call, "paging Howie
Lichter". Anyway, it was interesting to read about this
movie. Here’s what I know:
Howie was assigned to be my roommate by Western
Washington University in the fall of 1983. He was a
graduate of Lakeside School in Seattle, an expensive
private grade and high school. He had a thing for U2 and
the English Beat, and liked to date ugly girls who put
out. He fancied himself pretty worldly, and liked to put
on a Japanese robe and play with a samurai sword or his
painting kit. He was a drama student, and half of what
came out of his mouth was said just to mess with people.
We got along OK, but were hardly best friends. He told
me that he was in a movie called
Revenge Of The Teenage
Vixens From Outer Space, and I dismissed it as
more of Howie’s bullshit. ...Until I saw the movie in a
video store years later and rented it. Sure enough,
there was Howie, in a real movie. Yeah, it’s also a
really BAD movie, but still...
Kind of off the point, he also thought it would be
really funny to mail in a draft registration card with a
note saying a particular guy we knew wanted to kill
then-president Reagan. We had a swarm of Secret Service
agents at the door of our dorm room the very next
morning. His prank was much more successful than he
expected. I still laugh when I think about those agents
reading poor quivering Howie the riot act.
Anyway, I’ve wondered what happened to Howie Lichter
after we parted ways. He was a character.
Leif Jackson
October 17, 2007
Hello,
I just stumbled upon your website today and I love it.
It's brought back a ton of childhood memories. I was
born in the late eighties, so I haven't seen most of
these movies, but some of them I have. For several years
I had been trying to find out the name of a movie I had
rented often as a child and thanks to your site I found
it: Robot Jox. I remember going to the theater to
see Star Kid (my dad hated it, I liked it). Your
website has inspired me to start getting into the
lesser-known flicks.
I have a suggestion for you: 1963's The Terror
directed by Roger Corman and starring Boris Karloff and
a young Jack Nicholson. I saw it at 3 AM on a local
station last summer. It was filmed on a reused set in
only four days.
Keep up the great work!
Drew Wiley
October 8, 2007
Hi there,
I loved your site but I noticed you haven't reviewed any
by Troubled Moon Films. They are fantastic B-films that
use a lot of home-made CG effects. They have films like
Fungicide, Suburban Sasquatch, Tartarus
and Zombies By Design. Plus, they are about to
release Infinities Lock within a few months. I
thought you may enjoy to check them out at http://www.troubledmoonfilms.com
Thanks so much.
Sissy J. of Philadelphia
September 10, 2007
Hi
The first two Ator films are my favorite movies. I have
watched them dozens of times. The third film, was also
very good, but I was not very impressed with the fourth,
released in 90. Anyway, these films have a very large
cult following and I am wondering if you have ever heard
of the Ator series being revived with new movies?
Obviously Miles is too old to play Ator now, but I
really feel that there is enough material here for
several more films. A shame the early 80s Conan rip offs
genre lasted for such a short time. Thanks for your
help.
J
I haven't heard anything about a
new Ator movie. I'd be surprised if they announced one,
since the series seems to be only loved by a small cult
of bad movie fans.
July 9, 2007
Hi,
I found your site because I was searching on
Troll 2, and I'm a
huge fan! Creedence is my favorite...my friends and I
always imitate her lines! But I was surprised to see
two BAD movies that were missing from your site...
The Granny (VHS only) and The Ice Cream Man
There aren't quite as bad as Troll 2, but definitely
terrible! My favorite line from The Granny (feat.
Stella Stevens) is "you're the load I should've
swallowed!" They are both "horror" movies. Rent
them...you won't be sorry (or maybe
you will...haha!).
Andy
June 9, 2007
I stumbled on your site last night
after trying to find out about Thief and the Cobbler
(after taking 10 minutes to figure out the title from 16
years back). Surprise of all surprises, yet another,
blurrier memory earthed up from the sludge. He did the
absolutely terrifying
Raggedy Ann & Andy cartoon film I saw at age 5!
It was just a scant memory but your review brought it
all flooding back.
I am surprised and pleased someone has watched so much
oddball stuff, most of which I've seen, but I'm
especially pleased for your keen eye/appreciation of
animation and your willingness to review childrens'
movies. There are plenty of 'clut/z-grade' film review
sites (which, don't get me wrong, I certainly
appreciate) but very few dedicated to the warped and
quality control-free world of PG & G-rated films.
I grew up in a ridiculously conservative family wherein
I was not allowed to watch PG-13 movies until I turned
13, and expected never to watch an R-rated movie ever in
my entire life (although everyone knows how meaningless
that boundary is). Consequently, I've seen almost every
G and PG-rated movie ever made (although my parents
seldom rented movies from more than 20 years ago, so we
never got to laugh the night away with the Marx Brothers
or Three Stooges). Additionally, the small-town cheap
theatre showed G & PG movies for free in the summertime,
a new one each week for 16 weeks, for kids 12 & under.
So the innocuous films were a babysitter at home and
during trips to town, where my parents were buying
vibrators for all I know.
Here are some movies that, if you haven't seen, I think
would be right up your alley.
• ANOTHER weird-assed Pinocchio cartoon from 1987:
Pinocchio And The Emperor Of The Night. Pinocchio,
among many other misadventures, is turned again into a
puppet (apparently no made-up sequels want him in flesh
incarnate) and subsequently captured by the horrifying
demon of the title. No original characters are really
included: he does have some insect companions, most
memorably a flagrantly moustached, over-the-top military
bee.
• Bingo, if you can stomach it, an early-'90s
live-action flick that bored the shit out of me even as
a standard-free unscrupulous child. I think it was made
by Disney! It's about a badical boy who is befriended by
a golden reteiver who escaped from the circus.
• Bogus, possibly the worst movie I have ever
seen. Unfortunately, I had to suffer through it twice:
once in the free theatre and another time several years
later at the insistence of a child I babysat, who had
rented it and was excited to see it. In it, an
insufferable little boy (much like the one from the ABC
made-for-tv reincarnation of Steven King's "THE
SHINING") has to relocate after his mother dies. To
continue the circus theme, she was a very trashy circus
performer before her death in, IIRC, a car accident. The
little boy is shuttled over to be taken care of by
Whoopi Goldberg, who I believe sells silverware for a
living. Before ending up in her house, he imagines a new
friend in the form of a cartoon squiggle face which
eventually turns into a burly, wacky Frenchman, played
by Gerard Depardieu. A bunch of really boring shit
happens wherein Bogus (imaginary Frenchman) does the
obligatory help-the-kid-get-confident act. Then the kid
has some kind of crazy circus heaven/hell fantasy and I
believe the movie ends there.
The Plague Dogs, an excellent and overwhelmingly
depressing animated feature by Martin Rosen. It, like
his earlier animation of Watership Down, is based
on a less-popular Richard Adams novel. Two dogs escape
from a vivisection/animal experimentation plant to roam
the countryside and starve, accidentally causing death
and disaster after disaster. I won't spoil the end, but
it's really very sad, even more bleak than what I've
described.
If you are interested in further recommendations, I
would be happy to share them. Thanks for your wonderful,
detailed site.
All best,
Abbie
June 3, 2007
Hello,
First, Love the site, very entertaining. I remember
watching a movie called In The Company of Wolves
a long time ago. No one else I talk to seems to know
this movie, I believe it was made in the 80's. A weird
rendition of Little Red Riding Hood, that's the basic
plot. I would love to read your review of this movie, as
I haven't seen it since I was little (7 or 8).
Thanks,
Chris
June 2, 2007
Hi,
Great site, I've just started browsing it. I thought I'd
write and tell you that the movie
Prime Time is
apparently public domain now, because I have just picked
it up on Mill Creek Entertainment's "Drive-In Movie
Classics" 50 movie pack. The set also has
Rituals (under the
name The Creeper, and 3 Argento flicks. Not but
for $16
Thanks
Aaron
May 19, 2007
I was surfing the 'Net out of boredom
today and for some unGodly reason typed "america 3000"
in the search page, scrolled down the list of sites, and
clicked on your review of the terrible movie...I must
admit, your review hit it dead-on! Being a long-time
Chuck Wagner fan from his Automan days, I had
seen it years back and thought it was just as terrible
then. I also bid -- and won -- a vhs copy of it...I
paid $7 and felt ripped off. I did get a good chuckle
from your review, though.
While visiting a website that he's connected with and
responds to the forum on occasion, I asked him what in
the heck possessed him to make that movie, and his reply
was that they paid him an absurd amount of money to do
it, plus he got to travel. He didn't like the movie
any more than you or I did.
Because of your review of that crappy movie, I am
compelled to check out the rest of your site. I'm sure
your opinions will be dead-on as well.
Thanks for reading my ramblings, and have a nice day!
Jackie Hawkins
Rifle, CO
May 6, 2007
Hello, Greywizard,
Though I've had a link to your site in my bookmarks for
a long time, I just today took the time to scan your
listings and read a few reviews. Thoroughly enjoyable!
Thank you very much for your hard work!
I totally agree with you on the status, and appreciate
your reviews of, Breezy,
Real Men,
Evil Roy Slade,
Foolproof (love David Suchet!),
Homegrown, the original
In-Laws,
Let It Ride (I don't think you mentioned the
delectable Jennifer Tilly),
Mosquito,
Ticks,
Retroactive, and the absolutely
fabulous Rustler's Rhapsody.
I have a couple of suggestions of overlooked movies you
might want to consider. Firstly, Over Her Dead Body,
starring Judge Reinhold and Elizabeth Perkins (and
Michael J. Pollard again!). A rather unique casting is
that of Maureen Mueller as Enid: she plays dead most of
the movie. Of further interest is that the
background/theme music was composed and performed by the
same person/group as that of Real Men. (Sorry I can't
provide the name just now, although I saw it once on imdb.com--just can't seem to find it now.)
Another would be Prime Cut, starring Lee Marvin
and Gene Hackman, and a 22 year old Sissy Spacek in her
first credited, but second actual, movie role. Of
particular interest is that she appeared practically
nude, in a very sheer dress.
Then, there was Vibes, starring Cindy Lauper,
Jeff Goldblum, and Peter Falk. A pretty bad movie, but a
lot of fun--one that most would call a "guilty
pleasure".
Another guilty pleasure (of mine!) is Stallone's
Cobra. Love that '50 Merc with the license plate "AWSM
50".
Then, there was The Blackbird, with George Segal
as Sam Spade, Jr., and the gruff, rough-looking Lionel
Stander as his side-kick.
I know you don't care for John Ritter, but would you
consider Skin Deep for your site? The one scene,
with the glow-in-the-dark condoms, makes the whole movie
worthwhile.
In the horror genre, how about Squirm? A totally
unknown cast, most of whom went on to oblivion, but
there were some real gems among them: Fran Higgins, who
played Alma, and R. A. Dow, who played Roger.
As you might suspect, I'm an avid fan of "little"
movies--those that may go direct to video, or seldom
seen theatrical releases. Love to follow the character
actors as well; they "make" many a movie.
Best regards,
Jim Lamb
April 30, 2007
I accessed your web site to read a
review of a movie someone told me about (Earthbound)
. Years ago, my friends and I made an annual tradition
of renting a movie called She-Devils On Wheels (
amongst others) . It was so bad it was fun to watch, we
would fall off our chairs in hysterics and wait with
great anticipation for the really "great" special
effects.
Then the video store switched over to become a
Blockbuster - and they eliminated the actual "bad
movies" section the store previously had. We never could
find the movie again. Anyway, I didn't see it on your
index... it is definitely obscure and was truly awful as
well.
I look forward to checking out other reviews and movies
on your site. Thanks.
Patricia Czarnecki
April 11, 2007
Hello,
I recently found your website while researching a film
and was really impressed with your movie reviews and
coverage of obscure and cult movies. Your reviews are
great fun to read and don't follow the usual fanboy
ramblings I've read at other sites like IMDB and Aint-It-Cool.
I love the fact that you have entries for such long
forgotten films like
A*P*E, Ebony
Ivory & Jade,
Wild Wild World of Batwoman and
Ilsa Meets Bruce Lee in
Devil's Triangle.
I'm surprised that films like Rat Pfink a Boo Boo,
H-Man, Secret of the Telagian, They
Call Her One Eye and Lifeforce aren't
included in the movie list but then I'm not sure if they
would qualify for inclusion.
As a fellow film fan I think your site is a great
treasure trove of useful information and definitely look
forward to your new reviews and updates.
Cheers!
James Maruyama
April 4, 2007
Hi Greywizard, I loved your review of
Monte Walsh. It
is one of my favourite Westerns. I would love to get it
on DVD or video but it is impossible. Another Western I
love is Ford's Wagon Master.
Peter
February 20, 2007
Dear Greywizard,
I first happened on your site through a link that
connected me to your review of the movie
Flight Of Dragons.
I was absolutely shocked that someone besides myself had
seen the movie, and you were the person who convinced me
to round up a copy and see it again. Thank you so much!
However, this brings me to my criticism. I think that
your site could really use a ranking system for your
reviews, or at least a recommended or gem list, so that
you can separate the good from the bad. I know that this
would probably would take a lot of work, but I think the
addition would make your site even better.
Much Respect,
Nathaniel Winer
P.S: I also read your review of
The Last Unicorn,
and I am now going to get it for myself!
February 11, 2007
Welcome To Woop Woop still
remains as one of my worst time investments ever!!! I
sat through the entire thing waiting for the punch line,
then suddenly the credits rolled. Obscure, cryptic, and
unfathomable would all apply equally. Crude allusions to
implied nakedness serve as the bait, but the hook that
is embedded in my psyche forever can only be
characterized as bewildered regret for being so easily
and lingeringly bamboozled. I hate to do it you but in
all fairness and in the spirit of noble self sacrifice,
you should review it and warn everyone before they
suffer my fate, you may be able to save a few, but it's
to late for me. Thanks.
Kygila
February 6, 2007
[re:
Confessions Of A Serial Killer]
Hi,
I'm not sure how old the post was about this movie, but
I wanted to ask you about it. This was a movie that
really disturbed me when I saw it on cable as a teen.
I've written several scripts since then and one scene in
a script was directly influenced by a scene in
Confessions. I haven't seen the movie in years, so
I got the DVD off Amazon. But low and behold the scene
that made the impact had been deleted. The scene was
this brutal murder of the woman in the house. It was
horrific and perverse. But the scene took the movie to
another level. In fact, this DVD took out some other
violent scenes. So, I would track down an old VHS and
maybe the original footage is there. It made the
movie on the level of Henry with the original
footage.
George Vance
January 23, 2007
First, I want to say that when I found
your site I was so excited that something like this
existed, then began reading reviews and trying to find
the movies that looked really good (or really awful) on
Netflix. I was surprised how many they actually had. But
going through many of the reviews, I've noticed one
thing:
There is no straightforward rating system, and thus no
fast way to decide which movies I should take a look at,
besides clicking on EVERY link and reading EVERY review
all at once. Don't get me wrong, I want to read all of
the reviews, but I've been at the computer for over two
hours and have barely gotten through the science fiction
section. If there were some sort of rating next to the
title, I could get all of the movies I want from Netflix,
and then just enjoy the reviews.
I understand that a rating system may be difficult,
because some movies are bad, yet entertaining... so I
thought maybe you could rate them on both planes. If you
had one rating that was based around how entertaining
the movie was, then another on how good (or bad) it was,
the site would be ten times as navigable! I understand
this may be a difficult task to update the already
reviewed movies with a competent rating system, but I
think it'd be worth a try.
I hope my suggestion has any effect on the accessibility
of your site. It's excellent and definitely worth a
bookmark! Thanks for the good work.
John Fetterolf
January 20, 2007
Hello!
I am a long time reader of Unknown Movies, I found most
of your reviews to be hilarious, true, and to the point.
Thank you for that. A movie I request you see and review
is one called Boulevard of Broken Dreams (1994 I
think), It stars some guy named "John Waters". I have
never heard of the movie before hearing that Green Day
song by the same title that came out about 10 years
later. If you can't find a copy, I am willing to trade,
I have an extra copy.
Something else I want to comment (Or suggest) is your
commentary at the beginning of
Titanic: The Animated
Movie. Stay away from politics in your reviews, you
may offend some by stereotyping their affiliation. As
funny as the review was, would you be happy if you had
someone badmouthing conservatives in your reviews? Using
stereotypical quotes like "Reganomics makes PERFECT
sense!", "I hate N***ERS!", "Everyone should go to
church or DIE!!!", and "War solves ALL of our
problems!". If I used stereotypes about that, would you
be offended? David Simpson ( Ozy and Millie) did that
and lost a large portion of his fanbase, and I agree
with his views. No hard feelings, just don't do it
again, it's for your own good.
Thanks!
-Nathan
January 16, 2007
May I humbly recommend that you
consider screening They Might Be Giants? It was
made in the early 1970's, and starred George C. Scott
and Joanne Woodward, and Rue McClanahan is in there for
a bit, too. It's about a former judge who goes bonkers
(or does he?), and professes to be Sherlock Holmes. His
brother, in order to have him declared incompetent, has
him assessed by a shrink (Woodward)...
It's dated, and it's paced strangely (slow going), but
it's quite intriguing all the same.
While I'm Holmes-ing eloquent, you might take a look at
Without A Clue (Michael Caine and Ben Kingsley -
what if "Holmes" was just a publicity front, and it was
actually WATSON who was the genius?)
...aw, hell - since I'm here , let's go whole-hog, shall
we?
Here goes:
Check out Sundown: Vampire in Retreat - quite
funny, all-B-movie bloodsucker goofiness with David
Carradine in it.
...and then there's Noises Off...
...Breaking Away...and yes, I am Midwestern.
...and remember The Last Starfighter? It's not as
good when you're a grownup, but it's still pretty solid.
...or the original 70's TV teleplay Brian's Song
with the Malt Liquor man himself, Billy Dee Williams,
and James Caan? A man's not a man unless he cries at
that movie. Why it wasn't in theatres instead of
on...CBS?...I'll never know. The remake a couple years
back sucked. Wuss central.
Not even CLOSE TO manly, Defending Your Life is
of a much better quality than I would have ever expected
from an Albert Brooks flick.
Enemy Mine! (Quaid and Gossett) Forgot that one.
It's STILL great when you're an adult.
Jim Jarmusch's Mystery Train was messing around
with the idea of a non-linear timeline a LONG time
before anybody ever saw Pulp Fiction, and his
Night on Earth is like five different movies, all
with the same basic starting story but vastly different
results.
For a way-back-flashback to the classic black and white
40's stuff (I don't know if you do the real oldies on
your site, but what the heck?), there's Larceny, Inc,
with Edward G Robinson in a lighter-than-usual role as a
Hood who takes over a luggage shop in order to drill
through to the bank vault next door, and has to continue
business in the luggage shop so nobody suspects
anything...and then he begins to LIKE running a luggage
shop.
Oh - and another B&W moldy-but-goody, The Man Who
Came To Dinner is on god's own playlist...well, okay
- I just suspect it to be. But if it is, it's right
beside My Man Godfrey and The Thin Man
If you can face subtitles, Tampopo is hilarious.
Lame as it may sound, I've got even more - but I'll
spare you the list - I've probably gone too far already!
Hope you get the chance to check out some of them -
enjoy!
Katie Costello
-ps - are you of the Irish Baileys, or the
German-descended Bailey families? If it's the latter,
we're probably related...another of my geekdoms is
genealogy. Yeah, I'm REAL far gone!
December 18, 2006
Dear Greywizard,
Do you remember a movie called Allegro Non Troppo?
This movie was kind of an adult animated parody of
Disney's Fantasia, although there is the sad
vignette known as Valtzer Triste. I'm surprised no one
else has mentioned anything about this movie before, and
I guess not a lot of people remember it. That's why had
a hard time finding out what the movie was, and if it
was real.
Fourtunately, Wikipedia's Fantasia article mentions it
in the Fantasia parodys article, and Allegro
Non Troppo has its own article as well. But I wish
it could be reviewed so others can be exposed to this
hidden gem.
Mindy Partain
October 30, 2006
Greetings!
What a pleasant surprise to chance upon your site! I saw
your review of the soft-porno
Cinderella and
remembered a perfectly good hour wasted in 1980 until we
decided it was just not worth it. But I also recall the
only worthwhile scene which was the prince singing "I
can't get my knigdom to come" in a surprising baritone.
I'm now determined to wade thru the rest of your catalog
and check where else we have wasted our youth.
Kali K (nom de plume obviously
- the full word is the greek version of "gnome", or
"leprechaun")
October 25, 2006
[re:
Hollywood High]
I managed computer labs at a college
in the mid 80s. As an initiation (torture) process, I
made our student aides view HH. I suffered thru
the experience so I didn't want to be alone in misery. I
figured, if they can make it thru HH, they can
make it thru anything. A funny thing happened. The kids
started digging the movie because it was so BAD. They
invited their friends to come and soon Fenzie was a
hero! The wouldchant his name whenever he appeared on
screen and recite inane lines as "What we gonna do now,
maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan"? "Why do they call him
Big Dick"? Then everyone would chant "Big Dick, Big
Dick..." Chants of Ms Crotch, June East and Mr. Flowers
echoed down the hallway. Dude, look how wet those girls
are getting...maaaan, they are really wet...(during the
screen they splash in the water for 3 minutes) It was
hilarious because the movie was sooooo bad
everyone had a good time mocking it.
Hollywood High II is a darker version of HH.
None of the original cast from HH was in that
movie. The characters were spoiled, hateful kids whose
life revolved around sex and booze. I just wanted to
slap those kids. The "plot" revolved around a beer
drinking cop who harassed our heroes. The kids took a
picture of the cop with a prissy, virginal, classmate
(who was a minor) doing the wild thing in the weeds.
(while on duty) He was drinking too-not a good cop. They
used the photos as blackmail against the cop.
Another sub plot (deep storyline) is the boys in the
flick doing poorly in school and needing "private"
lessons from their lesbian teachers who were very kinky.
The girls became suspicious when their
boyfriends wanted their "lessons" more than being with
them. Those teachers were ugly. Classic line: "I wanna
feed ya before I #$%* ya..." I didn't require our
students to view HH II because there was nobody
to like in that horrid flick.
Gary
Pesik
October 4, 2006
The Wizard of Mars - Think
MST3K type sci-fi flick (I really feel bad they never
'did' this one) It has been a LONG time since I have
seen it (and only remember little bits of scenes) Google
has a lot of hits on this thing.... It 'stars' John
Carradine (sorry for the spelling) as only a disebodied
head with little screen time...the 'star draw power' in
the film.
It was made it seems for set-up for ONE joke, late in
the movie, and scenes like going down a river in a raft
with the background not moving at all are just priceless
to riff on. What is better, I have an original release
VHS tape of it that I would gladly copy for you to see.
Hmmm.....I need to fetch it from storage and see it
again now!
PS. I read your Hugo
the Hippo review-WOW! I want to see it now just
for the animation-I bet it worked a lot better in
widescreen, not a 5th gen VHS dub (I saw the picture
tearing in the screencaps)
Great site!
Aaron H.
September 30, 2006
Hi,
Just an update on gifted director Sparky Greene, creator
and director of A Savage Hunger.
As we learned from Jorden’s September 30, 2005 letter
posted here, Mr. Greene is a exceptional photographer
that chronicles today’s important stories.
http://www.newspress.com/mjacksonupdate/publicopinion/060405photographerdocuments.html
Also he and his lovely wife the former Jillian
Palethorpe from New Zealand are both directors of The
Tough Topanga 10k, an important non-profit 10k run in
Los Angeles. Take a look at this link:
http://www.topanga10k.com
Sparky is a gifted runner who perennially wins the gold
medal in his age class. Here are some pictures of him
and his charming family:
http://img525.imageshack.us/img525/3214/sparkygreeneap1.jpg
He and his wife run a bed & breakfast from their home in
the Malibu mountains, Take a look at this link:
http://www.ranchodelcielomalibu.com/
It is a damn shame for Hollywood that this talented
director was over looked and not given the chance he
deserved. Sparky is a creative genius who was an a
terrific character actor, short story writer, movie
director, photographer and now is a real estate mongul.
Marc S.
September 21, 2006
[re:
Troll 2]
Hey that review was right on. On a
side note, in spite of the overall retardness of
Troll 2 (which, by the way is in dead last place
place in the IMDB database which makes it the worst
movie of all time http://imdb.com/chart/bottom ) it is
making a comeback and gaining popularity as a cult
classic. Here is the latest website dedicated to this
horrible atrocity called Troll 2. http://bestworstmovie.com/
Who would have thought? According to the site there was
a big screen party in NY that actually sold out just a
few weeks back which have clips from the party on
YouTube.com. As well, there is a documentary being put
together about the movie and they are planning an
additional screen party in LA sometime in the near
future. Who knows, maybe making the worst movie of all
time will actually spawn some delayed rewards and
smiles?
Timmy g
September 1, 2006
As the co-winner of the 1975 Miss All
Bare America contest, I was interested in the film
Jabberwalk, which
you critiqued in an internet article. It would be fun
see myself on film in days of youthful glory.
You may be unaware that there were two winners of the
Miss All Bare 1975 contest. The first person chosen, a
buxom blonde whose name I cannot even recall, was the
Official winner at the time of the contest. However,
there was much public outcry that I should have been the
winner, and they ended up letting us "share" the crown
for that year. It was an interesting experience.
I loved the Old Beacon Theatre were it was held.(
Amazing that the Dalai Lama later gave a series of talks
on that very same stage.... What stories those walls
could tell ! )
My best friend Ritchie was the guy in the audience with
the cowbells. I wonder if that was in the film.
Since I later went on to get married, have a family and
career, I destroyed all evidence of my former days.
(sadly)
So, thanks for the memories!
Your truly,
Lisa (formerly from Georgia)
PS: I googled 1975 Miss All Bare America and found this
entry. Dontcha just love Google?
August 9, 2006
Hi,
I'd written you before, but you probably don't remember
me. (I'd questioned how a professor could like
Don't Go in the House
and you said YOU had written it, haw haw) Your site has
been among my "favorites" for a year now, and I was
purging them (too many!), and came upon your site again.
Naturally I had to see how far you'd progressed....
It's still pretty good! So you're looking for The
Farmer, too? If you haven't, join Netflix. They have
oodles of these old movies that were at drive-ins in the
'70s. I was a wee lad (10?), and always wanted to see
the long movie titled Last House on the Left
The House that Vanished Don't Look in the Basement,
which seemed to play with every double horror feature
and which played every summer at the drive-in and I
could never go b/c I was too young. (Boo hoo.) I wish my
parents had taken me to these t hings, b/c I'm still
trying to see every darn one of 'em all these years
later. I'm 39.... <deep sigh>
The Starz movie channels just started airing
Emperor of the North
(Pole?), about a sadistic train operator who kills hobos
riding his train. some critics loved it; others hated
it. I haven't seen it yet, but will try to tape it....
I've seen Last House on the Left every time it
came out with "new" footage, and the movie is repulsive
enough to have more people add things to it. The latest
is the PAL format (European) which has more features
when it was released to drive-ins in '79 with The
Amityville Horror. The latest MGM feature is I think
the most complete; the Euro one is edited, however. The
movie played drive-ins and midnight movie houses for 15
years. there's a great book out called Last
House...The Making of a Cult Classic. It really is
good; it cost $25 as it had to come from the UK. Or try
a second-hand book shop (call around), for a less
pristine copy for $5 or so!
Drive-in movies couldn't survive these days. People just
don't have the patience to sit through half of these
lousy movies! The House that Vanished was very
scary and tense...but you're waiting through the entire
movie for the dumb blonde to run to the cops to report
the murder she saw in the first 15 minutes! The "R"
rating wasn't for violence -- it was for an ugly sex
scene that comes out of nowhere! There's an uncut
version, but see the R, just for old time's sake!
Don't Look in the Basement is pretty good. I have
yet to see it on DVD. It's actually a murder mystery.
It's good.
* Tower of Evil/Horror of Snape Island --
Linda Blair's "Hell NIght" actually ripped this movie
off. It's bloodthirsty and was very scary when I saw it
on TV years ago (it was on at 2 a.m., back before the
24/7 cable shows). Some kids go to an island with a
light tower and meet some hillbillies and get killed.
*Rituals -- I
saw this on TV, but it wasn't as dark as another writer
claimed. It seemed to be very much the basis for
Friday the l3th Pt 2 years later. Did you know that
the distributors for Last House on the Left,
etc., distributed many Italian horror movies and copied
some of those kills for the F13 series? There's a neat
book ($20 or so) called "Making Friday the 13th". It's
very readable. No, I don't get a commission, but I did
give the author a lot of info. Despite the trashing it
got on Amazon, it's very good. The movie w/a lot of
copycat kills is Bay of Blood/Twitch of the
Death Nerve/Carnage by Mario Bava. F13
and Halloween ripped the kills off, and most of
the kills are onscreen.
I'm drawing a major blank on movies to see that played
the drive-ins. Some that I remember, garnered over the
years (keep in mind that movies often played in
theaters, then hit the drive-in a month or so later):
Blood Beach
Silent Scream
The Boogey Man
Toys are Not for Children
New Year's Evil (SUCKED)
The Dark
Beyond the Door
The Children (pretty good -- just out on
DVD!)(played w/Mansion
of the Doomed)
The Farmer (played w/House
by the Lake)
Apartment on the 13th Floor (often paired with
Last House...)
Fangs/Curse/Revenge of the Living Dead
Mary, Mary Bloody Mary (paired with Prom Night
in 1980)
Beyond the Door (played with Don't Go in House...)
The Rats are Coming, the Werewolves are Here!
(not bad)
Shriek of the Mutilated (great title; lousy
movie; no gore; how'd it get an 'R'?)
My Bloody Valentine (w/The Warriors, if
you can believe it!)
Texas Chainsaw Massacre (w/No Way Out)
Black Christmas (being remade; original is
excellent)
Hills have Eyes (w/Zombie)
House by the Cemetery
The Gates of Hell (sickening)
Drive-in Massacre
Piranha (w/The Bees)
Deep Red/The Hatchet Murders (good) (w/The
Worm Eaters and w/Night Evelyn Came out of the
Grave) (saw the latter on TV; not bad; heard the 'R'
version was awful; on TV it was cut and I saw last 30
mins or so)
When I was old enough to go to the drive-in (1985?),
they'd stopped showing B movies and I guess were losing
a lot of business to VCRs. It was often hard to hear
movies (static on the Am/FM radio frequency or the
drive-in sound boxes were lousy), or the people I went
to see the movie with wanted to talk and not watch the
movie (usually the case!). I never did understand this,
as I'd waited alllll that time to watch a movie in the
drive-in....!
If you're "really" into scouring the movies shown at
drive-ins, my suggestion would be to go to the library
and scroll through old newspapers to see what was
playing. It's very surprising! Today, the original
poster art for Last House... would be banned (too
lurid), and the "Living" section that had movies often
had few reviews or anything about movies like they do
today. You could easily spend a day scrolling through
any of these drive-in ads to see what you missed. I
don't think half of the movies are around any more or
they might be very hard to find (and may not, despite
myself, be worthwhile watching).
I did do this about a year ago, and felt like I did when
I was a kid living at home with my parents when I was in
junior high: I'd run down to get the paper every Friday
night (paper arrived at 5 pm) to see what the drive-ins
were playing. It was thrilling! I hope it's as thrilling
for you!!
Glenn Allen
Morristown, NJ
August 9, 2006
Hey,
As we speak,
Thunderpants is playing on TV down here in Sao
Paulo, Brazil. I guess it has something of a following
here, as it's the second or third time in the last year
or so that it's come on the most popular afternoon
family/kid's movie slot on Brazilian TV. That oughtta
tell you something. Actually, here in Brazil, a LOT of
American kids movies that didn't get US distribution
come on television...a lot of American movies in
General. I remember some movie with one of the
Carradines and Richard Moll (I think) coming on about a
bunch of high school kids that rob banks with automatic
weapons and stuff...the kind of silly nonsense that you
most likely wouldn't find stateside. Thought you might
find that interesting.
Hey, review a martial arts movie one of these days,
especially one with Chinese influence. Better yet, I
want to see Force: Five reviewed by someone in
the Cabal. I regret not having rented it from Hollywood
Video and I want to know what I missed. :)
Blake
July 23, 2006
You say you've reviewed every single
sketch comedy/parody movie. Au contraire mon frere!
I did not find one reference on your site to Loose
Shoes, which has Bill Murray and Buddy Hackett in
it, amongst others. Also, there's Miss Nymphet's
Zap-In, available from Something Weird Video, which
actually PRE-DATES The Groove Tube in 1970, and
features Arch Hall, Senior in his final film. Truly,
THE MOST obscure entry in the sketch comedy film genre,
methinks.
Anyway, great web site.
Keep it real,
Scott Mercer
July 16, 2006
[re:
Rituals]
I just read your fine review of this film. I saw the
movie today on DVD. It is now available on a 50 movie
DVD set called Drive-In Movie Classics. I purchased it
on ebay for about $20. The quality of the print is poor
and the ending is in darkness so it is very difficult to
see what is happening, but it is a suspenseful gem.
Mike Awe
July 7, 2006
I came across your website and didn't
see Lionman listed. It's a Turkish action movie.
YOU MUST SEE IT!
And as for Troll 2,
I believe the makers were trying to make a silly/wacky
movie, which is too bad cause if they would have made it
seem serious it would have been great.
Matthew Ward
June 30, 2006
[re:
Angel Of Fury]
Your review made me laugh very hard
for at least 5 minutes because it was completely honest.
I'm just trying to remember as this film has been linked
with the title Triple Cross which was the version
I saw when my dad owned his video shop; is this the film
where that little girl gets shot in the back and dies
the Rothrock gets emotionally angsty and snaps that guys
neck with her feet? Trying to locate this movie and
because of the title change it's not making it that easy
to find..
Aaron
June 17, 2006
Hey-
just came across your site and wanted to add to Jason's
recollection of seeing the film
American Raspberry
in Florida. I, too, am from Hollywood, FL and I remember
seeing this film not at the Cine Twin but at what was
known as the Hollywood Cinema, a twin theatre across the
street from the Hollywood (Sears) Mall. My mom and I saw
it in February of 1981 on a Tuesday night. I remember
this because my dad worked nights at the time and she
and I would go out to dinner by ourselves on Tuesdays
and then go see a movie at that theatre, as for a time,
every Tuesday night was dollar night.
The mall became infamous later that year as containing
the Sears Department Store that Adam Walsh disappeared
from and, being slightly older than he was, I remember
all the parents in our neighborhood suddenly put harsh
restrictions on our freedom.
I remember thinking the movie was really stupid and I
want to say that we walked out of it before it was over.
Just my 2 cents,
Kieran T.
June 15, 2006
I love your site, it's great and very
helpful. Here are some film suggestions you may have
received before.
Interstate 60 (2002) - Directed by Back To The
Future scribe Bob Gale. How this didn't get released
in the theatre is beyond me.
Testament (1983) - Will knock you off your feet
with it's intensity and brutality about what really
would happen if nuclear war occured in the United
States. And it's rated PG!
Charley Varrick (1973) - Directed by Don Siegel
and starring Walter Matthau in a rare straight
performance and Joe Don Baker as a brutal bounty hunter.
Tarantino lifted some dialogue from this and put in
Pulp Fiction ("A pair of pliers and a blow torch."),
but of course no one would know that since this film
never found the crowd it deserved.
Over The Edge (1979) - debatable if this is an
unknown movie. It probably has found it's audience over
the year. It is a masterpiece.
The Wanderers (1979) - debatable if this is an
unknown movie. Great movie though.
Coupe de Ville (1990) - a great movie about
brothers that hate one another and must go cross country
together. Starring Daniel Stern, Arye Gross, and Patrick
Dempsey.
- Let me know what you think, you are pretty tough if I
recall on what you classify as an "unknown" movie. You
still rock though.
- Jon
June 7, 2006
Once again I was pleased to read your
interview with Jim Bertges concerning Cannon (I e-mailed
you with some additional info after reading the
Demonwarp article)
and Jim is really quite accurate in his description of
Forbidden Dance.
We made the deal to make the picture on December 7,
1989, and it is true, the writers, director and I
conceived the story while driving to meet with Menahem
and close the deal. We delivered an approved answer
print to Columbia Pictures on March 15, 1990 --
approximately 3 months from conception of a major studio
theatrical film to delivery of releasable film elements.
That might be a record.
Jim was invaluable. He, and Bruce Akiyama, and later,
Joe Vittorie were really passionate about filmmaking,
while my interest was in making films that would sell,
and keeping them on budget and on schedule. I do not
think Jim and I ever had a disagreement about any aspect
of filmmaking, and Jim's say on creative aspects of any
film was simply taken as the final word, as I remember.
What he may not know is that I was Cannon's "American
Consultant" from 1979 onwards, advising Menahem and
Yoram at daily meetings at 3 pm what pictures would work
in the United States, and how to market those pictures.
I answered to Menahem and Yoram at Cannon, no one else,
but lnew everyone. Design Projects created the ad
campaign for Death Wish 2, Enter the Ninja,
New Years Evil, and probably hundreds more films.
Priscilla MacDonald, head of publicity, and I personally
pushed the Ninja concept at Menahem -- it was brought in
by Mike Stone, but Menahem was not sure it would sell.
We assured him it would, and then made charismatic Sho
Kosugi the promoted star ninja, because of a positive
photo session with Sho (I also brought Chuck Norris in
for photo shoots).
While Jim's boss at Cannon did not last long at the
company, many others did, and I remain friends with many
today, as well as friends with Menahem Golan. There has
never been a definitive book on the true Cannon years --
and there is not enough interest these days to justify
the effort. However, the era ended in the late 80's, and
will never return.
Rick Albert
May 24, 2006
I have been in recent communication
with Albert Pyun about my Max Havoc story, as
posted here. While we have a very different opinion on
the film experience of Max Havoc, I stand by my
story.
It was out of frustration at the payment situation of
the film (documented in my story) that I unjustly made
comments about Pyun here. I wanted to interview him for
my story, but he was unavailable. My story is lacking
because of that.
You can say whatever you'd like about Pyun's talent as a
film maker (and I did in my story and I stand by them,)
on the set of Max Havoc he was a nothing but
gentleman on the set.
I get the feeling that Pyun is a complicated person (as
we all are). I wish him all the luck in the future.
Ralph Coon
May 17, 2006
I might be incompetent (your
words)...or an idiot (words of a letter writer), but I
am relentless. Just wanted to tell you how much I
enjoyed your Omega Doom
review (honest) and your site in general.
I have three films coming out soon, the first being
Infection which Lions Gate Films is releasing in the
Fall. It's should provide some fresh ammo for my critics
(and they are legion!). Infection's won a best
picture award and has been invited to more than 20
festivals worldwide. The next one will be Pusan
International (Korea) and Vienna. It screened in March
at the Brussels International Film Festival of
Fantasy...and here's what a dutch reviewer said (forgive
the translation):
INFECTION
Hawaiian born Albert Pyun enjoys a dubious reputation.
Some call him outright to be a bad film maker while
others prize his films because of his offbeat scenarios
and his regular use of impressionable steady cam shots.
The man also has a vast share of fans for his
apocalyptic cyborg movies. Many visitors at the Brussels
Festival for Fantastic Films will remember that Pyun’s
Radioactive Dreams in 1987 won the Gold Raven
award. That fact in of itself makes Pyun not a bad film
maker.
His newest film Infection allows for a totally
different type of Pyun’s work and is not possible to
compare it with any of his other work. You could talk
about writing about a virus outbreak film with aliens
invading. A more accurate way to describe this work is
to imagine The Blair Projects meets the
X_Files. In this film Pyun takes great risks by
using just one unbroken shot. The 63 minutes are filmed
through the lens of a high definition surveillance
camera mounted on the dashboard of a police car.
The story unfolds as follows: A meteor with a dangerous
alien virus crashes just after midnite in the vicinity
of a town named Lawton. Larry Jenkins, a resident farmer
alerts the police. As inspector Bardo arrives, he
becomes infected through Jenkins. When Bardo traces his
path he comes upon a young couple, Timmy and Cheryl.
Bardo infects the unsuspecting Timmy and Cheryl and
escapes with them in the police car.
They have to endure the ice-cold night while the alien
organisms race towards the local population. These event
play themselves out during the night in a large park
outside of the town while the background information
comes through by means of the conversations held on the
radios.
It is amazing how this film can use a seemingly boring
single continuous camera shot can draw the viewer into a
tense drama.
The post production work certainly contributed
enormously to create the effect of experiencing being
clausterphobic and hypnotic., After awhile the viewer is
drawn into seeing things that simply are not there.
Infection stands apart as the ultimate viewing
experience. The actual film footage consisted of
uninterrupted 7 hours. There was barely a budget to
shoot 5 hours. Some of the actors had to wait for hours
before the camera arrived at their positions. The early
takes produced some problems which threatened to
railroad the project however, the later takes made it
all come together.
For this fact alone, seeing this film is worthwhile..
Although this film may not be every one’s cup of tea it
must be noted that it has already received two awards
for “Best Picture” and Best Director at the Estepona
Film Festival.
In addition, I'm editing an H. P. Lovecraft adaptation
and will begin shooting the sequel to my 1997 "classic"
(now be nice) Mean Guns. Its for Lions Gate Films
and Newmarket Films (who financed the original).
I know none of these will ever be reviewed on your site
(and I should remain exiled from your site), but I hope
you get to see my recent efforts.
Warmest Regards from your favorite incompetent idiot,
Albert Pyun
May 12, 2006
HI Greywizard,
My husband Samuel Vance and I are the writers and
producers of the film
Riverbend. Thanks for the review but I didn't
quite get any feedback from you about the writer. I
agree with you that this movie didn't get the proper
marketing, therefore it didn't have the chance to make
an impact on film stream. I feel Riverbend would
have had a real chance to be recognized as a film that
portrayed the good and bad view of racism. The "Variety"
gave it great reviews at Cannes and said it was a
Magnificent Seven type film and was the answer to the
movie Mississippi Burning. Steve James and Margaret
Avery would have been recognized for sure as they were
both very proud of this film. As in the movie, there was
no justice in giving the film, writers and actors the
recognition it deserved.
Valerie Vance
V&V Entertainment
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