On the title page for Teenage Wastedland I posted a Spoiler Warning that all the killers in each film would be revealed. So, before you get into the guts of this review, I’d like to reiterate that Warning -- and for good reason. Why? Well, frankly, Sleepaway Camp has one of the greatest shock endings of all time, and I’m a little antsy about spoiling it for those who haven’t seen it yet. Seriously; it’s a real kick in the head. So if you haven’t seen Sleepaway Camp, or are not aware of the surprise ending, then stop reading right now; try to see it first, and then come back and read this review.

Prelude #2 opens on a lake where a father and his two children, Peter and Angela, lounge on a small sailboat. Their tranquility is spoiled by some teenagers in a motorboat, churning up the water to water-ski. While dad isn’t looking, his two kids playfully push him in the water but their shenanigans backfire. During the execution of the joke, they capsize the boat, spilling them all into the water. Meanwhile, the teens are being more reckless; the boy allows the inexperienced girl to drive the boat and opens up the throttle, despite the skier’s protests to slow down. On shore, another man calls to the father, saying they’d better head in because Aunt Martha will be here soon. The kids become very excited, hoping to play with Martha’s son, Richie. But dad says Richie is visiting his father (only the first instance of marital irregularities to come), and starts to help them back onto the overturned boat. In the speeding motorboat, the teens aren’t watching where they’re going. Instead, they're watching the helpless skier behind them, and trying to hear what she’s screaming about. The skier sees that they’re heading right for the sailboat, but her warnings are deciphered too late. When they finally turn around, there's no time left to change course -- and their boat smashes into the sailboat, sending everyone sprawling. The man on shore expresses his horror, the skier screams, and the other teens look on dumbfounded: the father has been decapitated, and only one of the children survives the accident.

Jump ahead eight years, to the house of flaky Aunt Martha (Desiree Gould), where she’s packed a lunch for Richie (John Tierston) and Angela (Felisa Rose) for their trip to summer camp. Addle-brained Martha is a doctor (of something), and finally remembers what she’s been forgetting and hands the kids their physicals. (Is a physical required for summer camp? Hmmm? I'm thinking PLOT POINT!) Angela, whom Martha adopted after the accident, appears withdrawn due to her traumatic experience; quiet and shy, and has that constant thousand-yard stare. Worried because this is her first trip away from home since the accident, Richie promises his mother that he'll look out for his step-sister.

When the buses arrive at Camp Arawak, and the kids excitedly rush to the cabins to get reacquainted with old friends, as they thunder by, Artie (Owen Hughes), the camp cook, lecherously takes in all the little girls and makes lewd comments about nesting some young skirts. (Suspect #1 -- but five bucks says this creep dies first.) As the elderly Mel (Mike Kellin), the camp owner, and Ronnie (Paul DeAngelo), the head counselor, welcome the campers back, someone grabs Rich from behind. It’s his friend, Paul (Christopher Collet). He introduces Angela, but warns that she’s awfully shy. Paul then asks Rich if he’s seen Judy (Karen Fields) yet -- because she hit puberty over the winter and has developed quite a set of hooters. Seems Rich and Judy went steady last summer, but now, seems only interested in the older boys. Dropping off Angela at her cabin, unluckily for her, Judy shares the same lodgings. She ignores Rich but is already giving Angela a big stink-eye. And to make matters worse for the young Angela, she’s also stuck with Meg (Kathy Kahmi), the camp counselor from hell. Judy and Meg have already pegged her as a freak, which means it’s going to be a long summer for our recluse. But Meg’s assistant, Susie (Susan Glazer), seems a lot nicer, and the other counselors are aware of Angela’s history and Susie promises she’ll have a good time. 

So not only has she been tabbed a freak, she gets special treatment from the counselors: the kiss of death for any poor soul stuck at summer camp.

Several days pass before Meg finally complains to Ronnie that Angela won’t eat anything. So Ronnie takes Angela into the kitchen and asks Artie to help her find something she likes to eat. Promising he’s got something she’ll really like (uh-oh) Artie takes her into the giant walk in freezer, alone, and shuts the door. He then starts to undo his pants and demands that Angela comply with his advances. Lucky for Angela, Richie comes looking for her and blunders on to the scene before Artie can commit a felony. But Artie grabs Richie, violently shakes him, and threatens him with more bodily violence if he says anything. Grabbing Angela, they both amscray and run right past Mel. Neither say anything, but I think Mel knows what's up with his hired help. As the day moves on, Artie heats up a four-foot tall pot-! to boil some corn on the cob. The kettle is so tall, he has to stand on a rickety chair to look in to see if it’s boiling yet. It has. Meanwhile, unknown to the slovenly cook, he’s being stalked by a Rogue POV-camera, and while he ads some salt, the Rogue POV-cam grows a pair of hands -- that upsets the chair, causing Artie to lose his balance. He grabs a shelf, above the stove, and balances precariously over the boiling pot of water and turns to look at his assailant, recognizing whoever it is before the killer yanks the chair away. Artie falls, tipping the kettle of boiling water on top of himself. He screams in agony as his skin blisters up, then his assistant rushes in and sees the bubbling and gooey mess that once was Artie. 

The young hands tell us the killer was probably one of the campers. But was it the hot tempered and overly protective Richie, a/k/a Suspect #2, or the catatonic Angela, a/k/a Suspect #3.

After the paramedics haul what's left of the cook away, the doctor tells Mel his prognosis isn’t good. Not wanting to cause a panic (or stir up any bad publicity for the camp), Mel writes it off as a freak accident, pays off the cook’s assistant to keep him quiet, and orders Ronnie to tell everybody else that Artie quit. However, Mel has some other suspicions about what really happened.

None the wiser, Richie, Paul, and the boys of Cabin Six are finishing up the daily hazing of the nerdy Mozart (Willy Kinston) until Gene (Frank Saladino), their counselor, rousts them out for a baseball game with a rival cabin -- for five bucks a man. Richie and Paul lead the offense in the hotly contested game (and oddly enough, Mozart makes a spectacular game saving catch.) After the dust settles, the good guys win and Billy (Loris Sallahian), the rival team’s counselor, pays up. And I'll point out there is no love lost between Richie and Billy. (In fact, I’d say they’re openly hostile. That night at the rec hall, Billy and Kenny (John Quinn) are having no luck getting any girls to go skinny-dipping with them. With nothing to lose, Kenny decides to try his luck on the freaky Angela (who is sitting all alone.) But when she refuses to even talk to him, it degenerates into a brutal mocking session. Richie and Paul intervene and it quickly escalates into a brawl. The other counselors break it up -- but not before Richie makes several death threats if the others don't leave Angela alone. When Gene hauls him outside to cool off, Paul sits next to Angela and starts to talk to her. The conversation is totally one-sided but Paul doesn’t seem to mind. Richie told him about the accident, and he just wants to help. From across the room, Judy watches this display with disgust. (I don’t think she has a thing for Paul, I think she just hates Angela that much.) When the dance ends, Paul wraps it up by saying goodnight. To his surprise, Angela wishes him the same. (She speaks!)

Later, Billy and his crew go skinny-dipping -- without any female company. Meanwhile, Kenny (after downing some reefer -- which means he’s dead before the next reel) finally talks one of the girls into going for a canoe ride with him. He gets her into the middle of the lake and warns of water snakes. And then in part of some bizarre mating ritual, he tips the canoe over. He does promises to help the girl back into the boat -- but only if she’ll put out for him. When she swims off in disgust, Kenny submerges and comes back up underneath the overturned canoe to right it. Someone else surfaces, too, but we only see the back of their head. Kenny manages to ask Why are you here? before the killer grabs his head and forces it under water. On shore, the others finish their swim and call for Kenny to come in, but he doesn’t answer. Figuring he’s just playing another practical joke, they leave. The next morning, as the lifeguard starts to clean up the carnage from the previous night's non-sanctioned beach party, he finds the canoe, still capsized, washed ashore. He flips it over -- revealing Kenny’s dead body (omigod - they killed Kenny!) with one of his infamous water snakes crawling out of his mouth!

Mel can’t keep this one quiet but still insists it was an accidental drowning. But Ronnie isn’t so sure because Kenny was a real good swimmer, and while the body is loaded into the coroners wagon, the Sheriff (-- and dig that paste on mustache!) says they’ll know for sure after an autopsy. Despite the excitement, the day’s activities proceed. As the rest of the girls play volleyball, Angela rides the bench. Sneaking in beside her, Paul asks if she would like to go to the movie tonight at the rec hall with him. She agrees, but Judy catches them and sics Meg on her; who chases Paul off, and then yells at Angela that no fraternizing is allowed. After the movie gets out, Paul walks Angela back to her cabin. When they get there, he steals a kiss. At first, she’s apprehensive but doesn’t mind when he asks to do it again. He does, a little less awkwardly this time, but Angela stops it there and heads inside. After she’s gone, Judy appears and starts to put the vamp on Paul but he tells her to get a life.

Paul gets back to the boy's cabin in time to watch Richie push Mozart a little too far: Mozart produces a knife, threatens to kill him, and clumsily goes after his nemesis. Gene arrives, breaks up the fight, and confiscates the knife, but everyone sees where he stashes it. (Has Mozart been pushed past the breaking point enough to be called Suspect #4? Stay tuned.) The next morning, while the other girls swim, Angela sits alone in the bleachers near the lake. Paul manages to sneak in and see her again, and tries to apologize for being so forward the night before; but Meg and Judy catch them again, and Meg has had it with Angela’s alleged attitude -- but Ronnie intervenes and comes to her rescue. After the swim, the girls retire to the cabin where Judy asks everyone to thank Angela for getting Meg in trouble. Angela says she didn’t do anything wrong, but Judy doesn’t let up: asking why doesn’t Angela participate in anything? And why doesn’t she shower with the rest of the girls? (Plot point!) Poking fun at Angela's flat chest, Judy figures she hasn’t blossomed yet and is too embarrassed. Susie tries to stop this, but the haranguing continues with "Angela is a carpenter’s dream; flat as a board, and in need of a good screw." With that vile remark, Susie slaps her and she finally stops. Susie wants her to apologize, but Angela leaves the cabin. On her way to the canteen, when Billy and his goons pelt her with water balloons, this relatively harmless act causes Richie to go off the deep-end, and his profanity laced tirade and following death threats peel the paint off of the nearest cabin. Mel, who saw the whole thing, breaks it up and warns everyone if that kind of behavior continues, he’ll kick them all out and send them home.

Night falls and Mel is convinced he’s ruined: all but twenty-five kids have been removed from the camp due after all these "mysterious" deaths. (I won't even touch as to why any parent would leave their kid at camp where several homicides have taken place.) Wanting to just shut the whole camp down and send everyone home, Mel stews. When Ronnie suggests they should consolidate and at least finish out the summer, Mel thinks consolidation will only help the killer. But then again, he’s pretty sure he knows who the killer really is and mumbles something about Richie’s outburst, and how he plans to put his theory to the test.

We see her father in bed kissing another man -- for the record, it's the same man on the beach from the beginning. As she and Peter giggle while watching them, it gets even more surreal when we switch to her and her brother on a bed, together; the camera spins around them as her brother reaches out to touch her, and right before he makes contact, she snaps out of it. 

Angela pushes Paul away and runs off.

That night, Ronnie goes over the duty roster with his counselors: Eddie (Fred Greene) has to take the younger campers out for a night of real camping in the woods, Meg has the night off, and the rest of the counselors have to chaperon the dance at the rec hall. Sneaking back into the office, Meg asks Mel if his promise of a dinner at his house still stands? It does. (Dinner and what else?) She returns to her cabin to get ready, but the showers are all full. Telling Judy she’s going to shower in the now empty cabin next door, Angela watches her leave. Entering the dark cabin, Meg makes her way to the showers. While the Rogue POV cam lurks around outside, she turns on the water, lathers up, and leans against the back shower wall -- but then seizes up in pain! The killer has stabbed through the metal and skewered Meg in the back. (That’s some knife.) Meg falls, dead, and the killer washes the blade clean so we can confirm that it’s Mozart’s knife; then the water is shut off, and then the lights.

At the rec hall, the dance is pretty dull. Mel shows up and asks Susie if she’s seen Meg. Check the cabin, she says. And inside the cabin, Judy is making out with Mike (Tom Van Dell) until they here someone coming. Mike hides under the bed before Mel gets inside, and Judy tells him that the last time she saw Meg, she was heading next door to shower. After he leaves, Mike is so rattled about almost being caught, that he leaves, too, much to Judy’s disappointment. Next door, Mel hits the lights, and after a little exploration, finds Meg's body -- sliced up the back. Mel snaps: he had the killer caught earlier, but let him go; and in a righteous rage, he vows to not let that happen again and rushes off to find Richie. Back in the girl’s cabin, as Judy curls her hair, the door opens and the killer is silhouetted by the outside lights. Unable to make out who it is, the killer gets close enough to conk Judy on the head. Then the killer takes a pillow in one hand and pushes it onto Judy’s face while the other takes the hot curling iron and stabs Judy with it. And though we don’t actually see where -- it’s pretty obvious where the killer stuck it. Eek!

At the beach, unaware of all the murder and mayhem, Paul waits for Angela -- who finally shows up. (And if you get the sense that Angela isn’t very stable right now -- you’re not alone.) Telling Paul she wants to go skinny-dipping, the boy excitedly starts to strip down.

As flaky Aunt Martha talks to her new adopted daughter -- who we see from the back, and whose head is wrapped mostly in bandages -- she’s pleased as punch that her family will now have a little girl. And won’t Richie be surprised when he gets back from his visiting his father to find out he has a new sister! While she speaks, the camera starts to slowly move around them...Martha always wanted a little girl, and promises to buy the child a bunch of new clothes...when the slow pan completes the circle, we see the child is really Peter! It was Angela who really died in the accident. E'yup; Martha is a complete nutcase! And since she already had a son, and with no prospect of ever getting married again, she has been dressing Peter as a girl and has kept it a secret, even from Richie.

Until now...

It's almost unfortunate that this film is garnering such a cult reputation. Becoming too well known, most people are now aware of the surprise ending, and frankly, can't have the pleasure of that shock-ending walking up and kicking you right-square in the head. I've never seen The Crying Game, but I already know that the gal's really a guy -- so I don't think the film would have the same cinematic punch. Same here. And yes, I realize I'm not helping matters much, but, dammit, I warned ya!

But for now, let's back up and talk about the rest of the movie for a little bit. The brainchild of Robert Hiltzik, Sleepaway Camp was an independent production, which plays to the films advantage because that it is the only way it could have gotten away with that ending, among other things. Filmed over a span of 5 weeks for around $350,000 (which seems an awful lot when compared to some other budgets of films on this site), it was another entry in the stalk-n-slash boom of the early 1980s. Unjustly branded as a hack-job and a sloppy retelling of Friday the 13th, I disagree most vehemently. Most of the short synopsis in the film books I've read tell me the film has fallen victim to bullcrit. Yes, the film follows many of the same genre conventions as Friday the 13th and it's brethren, but look at it a little closer:

Friday the 13th was, basically, if you screw around and do bad things, you get impaled on something sharp. And that is so not the case in Sleepaway Camp at all; no, there is something far, far more perverse going on here. The film has more to do with puberty, sexuality, and gender roles than the actual act of sexual intercourse. The crux of the film deals with Angela, who has hit that awkward age of thirteen. She appears a little gangly and out of proportion, like she's just gone through a growth spurt. Of course, his/her surfacing puberty means larger doses of hormones and chemical reactions as the body starts to change and develop. And with this coming into direct conflict with her psyche and her twisted sense of self, is it any wonder, then (despite the obvious), why Angela's finally gone nuts and turned homicidal? And notice how Angela only kills those who threaten her, or, more directly, threaten to expose her true identity. (Sorry, everybody. I was pre-psych in college before I switched majors.)

You also have to give Hiltzik some credit for having the kahonies -- forgive me for that one, too -- for having kids killing kids. Young kids even; and I'm gonna assume those kids killed with the axe were the ones who threw sand at Angela after she got dumped in the drink. When's the last time you saw a film where someone under ten got axed to death? Again, with a studio, I doubt Hiltzik would have never gotten away with this. With the older counselors relegated to secondary characters, most of his young leads could use a few more acting lessons, but, for the most part, act a